May 14, 2008
Okay, none of y'all came through with any input when I first posed the question about alternate mortgage options, but I went ahead and kept researching.
I finally decided its on the level.
CMG Mortgage is registered with the Bay Area Better Business Bureau, and has no complaints.
The Mortgage Accelerator is not for everyone. You need good credit to get it, and you need to be disciplined enough to not think "Oh, I've got plenty of time to pay off/down the line of credit...!" If you spend too much, you'll put yourself in difficulty, because you have to delay spending money as much as possible to let the interest cancellation work.
The fees are only a little higher than a traditional mortgage. The rate does float, right from the start, but you can put a 1% cap that extends for a full 5 years for a little extra in closing costs.
The upshot of it is, if we paid every extra dime toward a conventional mortgage, we'd pay off our mortgage in 5 and a half years, and pay about $42k in interest. We'd have to leave a little extra in the bank for emergencies, and if we had a big emergency, the only choice would be to use a credit card. But with the mortgage accelerator, it looks like we can pay it down in 2 years and 9-10 months, and only spend about $14.8k in interest.
I will provide updates as I go to let you know if run into any surprises. I've been blogging for nearly 6 years now, so you can rest assured I'll be here in 2 years and 10 months to tell you if the mortgage was paid off as expected.
Show Comments »
I would like to give you free advice from over three years experience with what the mortgage acceleration industry has to offer. You may be able to save your self from spending thousands in closing cost.
888-715-6267
posted by
Scott Schaffer on May 15, 2008 03:58 PM
Could you please post your experiences over the last 3 months with this product, the HOA?
I would also like to know your experience with the Concierge Desk, etc. Some of my clients and their borrowers may want to read this.
Thank you kindly.
Brian L.
posted by
Brian Laursen on July 17, 2008 03:59 PM
« Hide Comments
April 22, 2008
I'm moving now. I'll be out of touch for a few days.
Email contact is probably the best way, but even that may be out for about 48 hours.
We'll see.
Show Comments »
April 16, 2008
One thing people used to say about me:
"You're a really nice guy, and you're really intelligent...but sometimes you have bad judgment."
That's a tough one to get over. If you have bad judgment, then how can you get better judgment? The only way you have to evaluate your decisions is the same judgment ability that led you to make bad decisions in the first place.
Well, I've made some progress. As stupid as it may sound, it took me until I was nearly 40 before I learned to stop making decisions based on emotions, and to stop making decisions based on avoiding worst-case scenarios and/or fears.
I still have farther to go on this, obviously.
But I was thinking about why I am that way.
Here's what I came up with:
I was raised by books.
Not quite the same as being raised by wolves, because you end up relatively clean and with relatively decent table manners.
But everything I learned about how to be a man, a person, a friend, a co-worker, etc, came from books.
Why?
Partly because I was the youngest of 6 kids, and my parents' version of raising their sons was semi-benevolent neglect. They made an effort to prepare their daughters for life, but by the time I came along, they felt my academic excellence meant I didn't need any help, maybe. I realized this when I read a book on running a church youth group, and it said, "Find out what your youths' parents are teaching at home, and work that into your program," and I was stunned by the concept of parents teaching their teenagers anything. As long as I wasn't causing trouble (and I never did), my parents just watched me play sports and ate dinner with me. That was about it.
But I can't fault them.
Because ever since I was younger than I can remember, I thought books held some secret to life. I believed what I read in books. If a book claimed to have an answer to where life came from, or the nature of God, or how to stop war, or what women really wanted, I ate it up. Now, I never found any of those things that convinced me they had found the Truth in any of those books...but I sought it.
And along with all that, I saw justifications given for just about any behavior. In books, you know the protagonists reasons, and they lie, cheat, prevaricate, dissemble, run away from problems, seek revenge, etc...and unless the book is a morality play, everything works out for them in the end.
This is a powerful lesson to a 6-year old reading pre-teen and teen level books. And to an 8-year old reading adult-level books.
It's only been recently that I've realized how this has adversely affected my character.
I don't allow myself those lower standards anymore. I don't think that it is okay to take the low road just because I'm upset, or because I think it is important enough. I no longer try to get myself out of trouble by shading the truth. I no longer put my highest priority on avoiding trouble.
It seems like this realization happened too late. My personal life is in shambles right now, and has been for the last 6 years, plus. I don't know what even the next few weeks will bring.
Luckily, I'm mature enough to not let it affect my work. And I'm mature enough that it's not even affecting my mood. My life is a shambles because I made it that way. Right now, I don't know how I will put it back together, or what it will look like when I get it put back together...but put it back together, I will.
I have a long life ahead of me, still. And it's going to be a good life.
Show Comments »
Very thought-provoking post. After reading it, I realized that I too was largely raised on books (and a little bit of TV as well). Not because I was a neglected child, but largely as an escape. Also my whole family tended to be voracious readers, particularly my brother, the ultimate sci-fi bookworm, so I was just following the family norm.
I too realize that while reading may have expanded my horizons, it hurt me early on as far as developing social skills, something which haunts me still to this day. I too tend to get frustrated and lose it when a situation (or person) doesn't follow a nice, neat script or storyline and I don't know how to deal with it. My people skills have improved, but not enough to where I feel totally confident around anyone other than close friends and family. And I still tend to be skittish about uncomfortable or confrontational situations.
And I dont wish to come across as presumptuous, but I hope you're not blaming yourself for losing custody of your kids, if you truly felt you did all you could. Honestly recognizing and admitting mistakes is one thing but if you genuinely got screwed by the ex and the courts, don't take the blame on yourself.
posted by
diamond dave on April 16, 2008 12:29 PM
I'm not blaming myself for losing custody.
But there are other aspects of my life that I now consider "in shambles". I should not be in the position I am at my age in several areas.
Luckily, I've made some good choices in other areas that help to make up for it. I can get back on track, and will.
And I'll do what I can to let my kids know I love and miss them from afar.
posted by
Nathan on April 16, 2008 03:07 PM
Nathan, for what it's worth, you're definitely a good man. I didn't say perfect or unerring or without fault, but none of those are obligatory for being a truly good man. And that you are.
So, cheers to you and best of luck to you.
posted by
andy on April 16, 2008 05:54 PM
Me, too. Almost all of it.
posted by
Mr Lady on April 19, 2008 05:05 PM
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April 10, 2008
Somewhere along the line, I developed a standard for whether a car purchase is worth it.
I'd like to build the suspense to make it seem more profound, or insightful, but what's the point?
I'm willing to pay $100/month for a car.
That's it. Flat and simple.
So it is worth it to me to purchase a car if my cost of use (excluding routine maintenance, insurance and gas) is about $100/month.
With that standard, I purchased my 1998 Toyota Corolla for $6500 (overpaid, alas!) when it had about 50k miles on it. I had the expectation of driving it into the ground, which would make up for overpaying for it. To drive it to the point where it is worth only salvage --about, say, $500-- would mean 60 months, or 5 years. That is doable for a Toyota that was 8 years old when I purchased it. 5 years at 20k miles/year would be a total of 150k miles, also doable in a Toyota. Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately, in the end), someone hit the Toyota and the costs totalled it. I was given $4400. I drove it for about 23 months without having to do any repairs.
That means that I "lost" about $2100 over 23 months. That means I did okay, and got my money's worth. And even before I did the calculations, I felt good about the worry-free use I got out of it.
Now, I purchased my Chevy Prizm for $3000 last year, and it had about 85k miles on it, now 90k. The blue book value is $4600. There's almost no way I will not make money when we sell it. I think there's a chance I could get as much as $4k. That would fill me with pride, getting to use a car virtually for free for 18 months, and even increase my bank account by about $1k for purchasing/driving it.
The same deal with my '98 Mazda 626. I purchased it for $1k with 85k miles. If it lasts 10 months without needing any repairs, we get into bonus/free use time. And if I sell it (eventually) for at least $1000, then I had a free car for however long I used it.
Now, the problem comes in with older cars about the repairs you need. The Mazda will hit 100k miles before long, and will need repairs. The electric mirrors don't work. The windshield is cracked, there's some rust on the body, and a taillight cover is cracked. I think I could take care of it all for $700. That means I need to drive it an additional 7 months to get my money's worth. And the paint is bad. So after I drive it for 17 months (moving into the bonus/free time), I can start setting aside $100/month for restoration and/or upgrades. So 10 months after I move into bonus time, I can get the car repainted to look new again. Then maybe a few months after that, I can put some performance parts on the engine, raising fuel efficiency and/or power.
The lesson is, you can do a great deal of work on a car to restore it to new condition at $1200/year.
Thus, when a car gets older, as long as there isn't a string of things ready to go wrong with the car, it probably is more cost effective to keep and continue repairing an older car instead of buying a new one.
Let's compare that to new cars. New cars lose half their value in the first 5 years, if I recall correctly (except for Hondas and a few other cars...Audis?) So that's 60 months. If a car depreciates no more than $6000, you have gotten your money's worth. That means you can purchase a $12k car, drive it for 5 years, sell it for $6k, and at least have your money's worth. Unless you can guarantee your new car depreciates slower than that, you shouldn't buy a new car.
A $14k Honda is probably worth $10k after 5 years, if you take care of it. Hondas are worthwhile to buy used. But even as good as Audis are at holding their value, their starting price is so expensive that you probably use up your $6k in depreciation within the first year. Then again, you get a much better car and much more enjoyable experience than in a 1998 Mazda 626, so you may be able to calculate on the basis of $200/month, or $300 month.
The lesson? Stop and think about how much you feel it is worth to you to drive a car. For me, I can get good used Japanese sedans that are in nice condition, (relatively) low miles, and fun to drive for very reasonable prices if I spend a little time looking. If I really look hard, I've proven I can find cars I can drive almost for free. The advantage is I waste less money while driving decent cars, and my investment is lower if something untoward happens (like someone hitting my car on a motorcycle).
Thoughts/reactions?
Show Comments »
Well put. It isn't worth it to buy a vehicle brand new, as it loses a good chunk of its value just leaving the lot. Better to spend money on a lease returned after two years, with a broken-in, clean, low-mile vehicle often still with a warranty. Another way I've acquired good vehicles is to buy a functional car with a blown engine dirt-cheap, and have a rebuild/used engine put in. Do it right (Japanese cars are great for this) and you got yourself a good paid-for set of wheels for at least the next five years. That's about how long my old Honda Civic lasted before it got rear-ended, and my current Pontiac Bonneville seems to be lasting about that long, so far. And with the economy going south and price of gas going north, who can afford a car payment?
One note - I never touch a vehicle with a history of transmission problems. For some reason you can swap out a motor and virtually any car will run like new, but once a tranny goes bad, the car will never run right again, even with a transplanted tranny. Just some experiences I've had, along with witnessing close friends with similar experiences.
posted by
diamond dave on April 10, 2008 12:48 PM
Hmmm...
That's good advice about the transmission issue. I'll remember that.
posted by
Nathan on April 10, 2008 01:13 PM
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April 01, 2008
It's almost not worth surfing the internet today, because you can't believe anything you read. It might be true, but you have almost no way of knowing for sure.
Personally, I don't really like playing jokes on people.
Well, let me clarify: the bulk of surprise parties and April Fool's pranks seem to consist of working really, really hard to make someone feel bad, horrible, ignored, hated, etc, just so you can say, "Surprise! We actually did remember your birthday!" or "I actually wasn't raped!"
Which means you can't get around that you happily, deliberately made someone feel like crap for a while.
Maybe someone can talk me out of it, but I think doing something like that makes one a shitheel. Low quality character. Unforgiveable, in my opinion. And somewhat of a revelation that many, many Americans have a desire for ostensibly-sanctioned cruelty.
Show Comments »
Did someone get punked?
posted by
Mr Lady on April 1, 2008 08:14 AM
Nope. I'm usually pretty good at seeing through that sort of crap.
But you have urban legends of someone committing suicide because someone pulled a prank and convinced them something horrible had happened, or convinced an insecure person that their birthday had been forgotten...
...and it strikes me: it really is cruel.
posted by
Nathan on April 1, 2008 08:55 AM
Y'know, I'm with you on this one.
I have nothing against poking a little fun at someone GENTLY. Considering that I poke fun at myself a great deal. But I can't stand feeling like an idiot, and I don't like making anyone else feel that way either. And feeding someone's insecurities is a really crappy thing to do as a joke.
posted by
diamond dave on April 1, 2008 09:58 AM
I, sadly enough, have just never been creative enough to come up with a good prank. And so I abstain also.
posted by
Mr Lady on April 3, 2008 03:29 PM
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« Hide Comments
March 27, 2008
Illegal drugs or prostitutes.
Show Comments »
Illegal drugs? Wellll... I was once young and stupid enough to dance with Mary Jane a few times.
Hookers? Never, and never will. Even if I weren't married. Kim du Toit has an interesting essay on his site regarding his views on "rental sex", which tend to parallel mine quite well. I could never derive personal pleasure from what amounts to a business transaction, no matter how dirty she can talk in my ear.
posted by
diamond dave on March 27, 2008 03:48 PM
I have never done illegal drugs either, and really? Prostitutes? Dude, these poor dudes are dating the WRONG chicks.
posted by
Mr Lady on March 28, 2008 09:02 PM
« Hide Comments
March 20, 2008
...have I mentioned lately how hot stay-at-home moms are?!?
Show Comments »
Nicely done, sir.
posted by
Mr Lady on March 20, 2008 09:58 AM
Flattery will get you nowhere. Where's my MILF damn traffic?
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« Hide Comments
March 13, 2008
I'm trying to apply to About.com as one of their Guides.
I think I have an incredible amount of knowledge, understanding, and teaching ability on any one of several topics.
Wish me luck, but it may be impossible.
Show Comments »
I do not mind that a whole lot, but any time he comes to a phrase with the document P in it, he spits nearly all over a fellow.
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« Hide Comments
March 11, 2008
Try it out.
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Show Comments »
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March 10, 2008
I see this picture:
...and my first thought is: "Interesting. The Ukrainian Army doesn't have standardized footgear for females."
...and my second thought is: "It's gotta be uncomfortable marching in high heels."
Show Comments »
Did you know that I am something like HALF Ukrainian? Oh, yes, my legs look JUST like that.
posted by
Mr Lady on March 10, 2008 11:36 AM
Half Ukrainian?
That would mean that only one of your legs look just like that, right?
Right or left left?
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« Hide Comments
March 06, 2008
March 01, 2008
I am drunk.
And all it took was 3 Sam Adams (original Boston Lager) and a Gordon Biersch Marzen.
Return to your lives, citizens.
Show Comments »
Congrats! That explains why you never acknowledge comments or links!
Not far behind you, brain-boy...
:o)
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Joan of Argghh! on March 1, 2008 03:27 PM
I don't see the links, most of the time.
I need to upgrade this blog, but, well, it's free. And every time I move I lose about 60% of my traffic. :(
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Nathan of Brainfertilizer Fame on March 1, 2008 03:31 PM
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« Hide Comments
February 19, 2008
I ended up over at Ann's place, (because I saw a link that said she was just in Hawaii), and saw this picture from "16 Candles":
And I thought I recognized a few people in there, maybe. I could swear at least 5-6 of those pre-teens ended up in other movies, later.
So my question is: did any of them do so? One kid looks like one of the Goonies, and the tall blonde looks like the bad guy from Karate Kid. But I don't know that much about Hollywood child stars, and I'm hoping someone else does.
So let me know in the comments: did any of these geeks/nerds end up with a named role in any other movies?
Show Comments »
I know for a fact that John Cusack is in that crowd.
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February 17, 2008
I took this picture this afternoon, on our trip to Oahu's North Shore (on the way to Shark's Cove).
Show Comments »
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January 29, 2008
We're all about self-sufficiency, here at Brain Fertilizer.
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« Hide Comments
January 18, 2008
See?
Show Comments »
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« Hide Comments
January 10, 2008
January 09, 2008
Great trip. I was there 4 days, and it wasn't enough. Far better than Kauai, in my opinion.
More soon, maybe some pictures later this week.
Show Comments »
December 21, 2007
89%DRUNKARD
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« Hide Comments
December 04, 2007
here.
I am an excellent kisser, by the way.
Show Comments »
Hi,
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« Hide Comments
October 19, 2007
Sort of.
I wish I could have attended a school like this.
Show Comments »
September 18, 2007
Space-based solar power harvesting beamed to earth.
Sweet.
We need this.
After spending weeks in information-gathering mode, a Pentagon analyst says the idea of putting satellites in orbit to harvest solar power and beam it down to Earth has lots of merit - and a test of the concept could be set in motion by 2015.
Show Comments »
September 14, 2007
Pictures of attractive young chinese women applying to become flight attendants.
Show Comments »
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September 04, 2007
What is your favorite Bumper Sticker ready quote from Brainfertilizer?
Read More "Audience Participation Time, II" »
Show Comments »
"You know what Fertilizer is made of, don't you?"
posted by
Jeremy on September 4, 2007 09:43 AM
...that wasn't very nice! 8P
posted by
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I must admit that:...
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August 30, 2007
August 27, 2007
Of course, it's only until the US realizes there is a new sports competition and gets involved.
Some frustrated parents will live their second childhoods by forcing their kids to practice in that 30 minutes right after soccer and before equestrian training. Then despite the near-total lack of spectator interest, feminists will demand that women's cell-phone throwing have the same funding at the college level as the football program.
Bonus Untrue Fact: Before this, the Finns only other claim to fame was making a high-quality version of the Mosin-Nagant M91/30...
Show Comments »
If perhaps a workman, clerk, or alternatively salesman sees that his current king is intrigued in this husband personally, that he sees just what service has been rendered and is anxious to frontward his social welfare plus that of the dwelling, you will find no energy, trouble, or alternatively discomfort which he will likely not undertake to perfect a process which the boss has undertaken.
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August 26, 2007
Paula asks:
Called Dish net work to try to fix my TVS in bedrooms. Went to Virizon to try to get my money refund. But these two things I didnt do as good as my husband did. Dish told me they will sent a technician to my house, but would charge me $50, but they can only come this weekend. My husband called and yelled at them, then they will come to my house tomorrow to fix TV. Virizon refused to refund my money, they said somebody must download data from my cell phone, but I never did it, and I didnt know who did it. My husband called verizon again to raise the hell, then they will refund my money tomorrow.
My husband told me that I should understand why his temper is not good, because others cant screw up him, but my temper is good, and others always screw me. It seems what he said make sense? What do you guys think? Honestly in China people are nice and easy to get along with, and others usually take advantage of their nice. Americans are the same??
Your husband's way is one way to get things done.
But we call it "burning bridges". If you ever watched "tongji miyou" (Fighting for Love) with Zheng Xiuwen and Tony Liang Qiaowei (I think that's the pinying), Zheng Xiuwen gets things done by treating her employees really bad, but then when she needs help, they refuse because they hate her.
If you need to get things done, there are two things you can do:
1) Explain to the customer service representative exactly what the problem is and what you want them to do: "I didn't use my cellphone that much, and you can look at my record and see I never did it before or after. Because I've been such a good customer, I want you to remove that charge from my bill."
Be calm, patient, and reasonable.
2) If they refuse, then ask to speak to the customer service representative's supervisor. They usually cannot refuse. Due the same thing with supervisor, i.e, explain what happened, what you want, and why they should give it to you. If the supervisor refuses, then ask to speak to [i]their[/i] supervisor, then do the same thing.
If you go all the way up really high, you can usually find someone who can help.
3) At whatever level you get stuck, meaning they won't agree to what you want, and they won't let you speak to their supervisor, then ask them to slowly explain exactly why they refuse, because you will send a letter explaining exactly what you want, why, and why they refuse to the Better Business Bureau, the local Chamber of Commerce, and the consumer protection/investigation division of the largest television and newspapers in the region.
If that still doesn't work, you use your final weapon:
Nicely hang up, wait until the next day, and call again. Often, just speaking to a different representative or supervisor, you'll get one that thinks your request is reasonable and will give you exactly what you want.
All while being pleasant.
Show Comments »
August 24, 2007
Sure, we* laugh at him... But sometimes he makes some good points.
The only thing is, even if everyone follows his suggestions, we'd reduce our energy costs by something like 10%. And that's if everyone does it.
I think it is better to point out these things as a way to save money:
Do these things and give yourself a 10% pay raise! Stop wasting your own cash on heating/cooling!!!
1. Compact fluorescent lightbulbs
These energy-efficient bulbs cost less than $4 and are produced by major corporations like GE. If every household in America switched five regular light bulbs for five fluorescent bulbs, it would be the equivalent of taking 1 million cars off the highways for a full year.
2. Outdoor solar lighting
These yard or patio lights cost less than $20, and they don't burn any electricity or produce any CO2.
3. Programmable thermostats
Though these thermostats cost from $50 to $100, they can actually cut your heating and cooling costs. Set the setting so it's a little bit cooler in the winter and warmer in the summer when you're not in the house. A difference of 2 degrees can reduce a home's CO2 emissions by up to 9 percent over the course of a year.
4. Air filters
Changing the air filters in your heating and cooling systems regularly can knock 2 percent off of your CO2 output each year.
5. Electric water heater blanket
Water heaters use a lot of energy and generate a lot of CO2. A blanket costs less than $18 and can cut your home's CO2 emissions by almost 4 percent.
Read More "Gore Has Some Good Suggestions" »
Show Comments »
August 22, 2007
Top Ten Money Drains
Here's the thing: wasting money is like a pay cut. If you don't waste money on a regular basis, it is like a pay raise.
If you make sure you don't pay interest (on anything but your mortgage...a house is nearly impossible to pay for all at once), it's like giving yourself somewhere between a 5 and 10% pay raise.
Most people pay between 11 and 19% on credit card interest. That's huge. And don't get sucked in by the 0% interest balance transfers: they usually have a transfer fee that means you pay 3% up front; it might be worth it, if you do the math...but better to not have the debt at all.
Yes, that means you shouldn't pay interest on a car, either. Particularly since a car's value depreciates, it just isn't worth it. If you purchase a new car for $15,000, even at 5% interest you'll be wasting almost $2k over 5 years. Obviously, it's even more if you buy a more expensive car, or if you extend the loan to 6 years, or can't get 5% interest.
You don't have to buy a new car anymore to get reliable, fuel-efficient transportation. Cars last longer; 100k is no longer an automatic death for any brand except maybe Kia (and I might be slandering them...Hyundai has excellent quality control these days).
I can afford to pay cash for a Lexus, Acura, or BMW right now. But I drive a '99 Toyota Corolla and an '01 Chevy Prizm. Why? Because neither of them have given me a lick of trouble in more than a year. The Prizm has nearly 100k miles on it, but I am confident I can drive it up to 150k without a hiccup. I plan on driving it into the ground, because when you get right down to it, it transports 4-5 people to a destination in comfort, safety and convenience. Isn't that all you need from a car? Why waste the money on new car payments and interest to get essentially the same function?
That money adds up.
But, as always: you get what you pay for. I do not wish to disparage those who value the enjoyment of the bar experience, who savor their Starbucks Coffee (I think it tastes burnt, personally), who value getting the latest and greatest car at their earliest possibility (I, too, have purchased new cars...but regretted almost every time). Some people like to purchase what they can afford at the earliest opportunity. Patience pays, but we all make our own decisions and live with the consequences. I just like to clarify what those consequences are, exactly.
Show Comments »
August 21, 2007
If you are watching a documentary with other people, there are times the narrator will make a declaritive sentence, and then pause.
Something like: "After successfully exploiting the Normandy landing and breaking through the German lines, the German Army was completely demoralized and on the run, and were rendered unable to resist the Allied spearhead into the German heartland."
Maybe 10% of the time, it is a deliberate set-up, and after the pause, the narrator will say, "Or...were they?" and then go on to narrate some surprising event, like the Battle of the Bulge.
That means the other 90% of the time, you can insert an appropriate version of "Or...did they?" into the dramatic pause.
It's only funny if you do it about 30 times, and even still, it's probably only funny to you and the one friend with the right attitude. That is, if you even have friends after trying out an annoying stunt like this.
Have fun!
Show Comments »
August 20, 2007
August 14, 2007
A flying house!
Seems to me something like this would be a good replacement for a fixed house. You could take vacations in it. No property taxes. 5k sq feet of living/storage space would cost close to a million for a brick-and-mortar house, in most locales, no?
I may have to save up for one.
Show Comments »
August 10, 2007
August 09, 2007
Thoughts from Dr. Life.
Show Comments »
It costs one no little exertion even to cede the possibility of a Catholic's credulity: to share in his rapture and fidelity continues to be further from your sway, and I would get from this church no other feelings but some of those of shame and pain.
posted by
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« Hide Comments
It seems like lately I've just posting links to things you probably saw first at Instapundit.
Well, you stick to what you're good at.
The above link points to an article about moon basing that I saw from Instapundit.
Show Comments »
Its okay.
I don't read Instapundit
posted by
Jeremy on August 9, 2007 11:59 AM
Hitherto the dual soul has evolved in the realms of spirituality, here it stands, in the celestial balance, amongst the eight, giving way to snare, takes the blocked fruit and speedily awakes from its strictly spiritual state to grow to be fenced by the tricks of matter.
posted by
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August 06, 2007
After owning the entire DVD series for more than a year, I finally got around to watching the Firefly series.
Good! Despite the rave reviews by fans, I'd even say "Surprisingly good!"
It has its flaws, of course. I'm halfway through the second episode, so I'm not totally sure the series has already decided to betray the "crew first, business second, nothing else matters" character they established for Capt Mal. But aside from that, the acting/dialogue is sometimes a little too overwrought. Kaylee is a little too cute, the "whore with a heart of gold" tries a little too hard to be sexy.
But the humor is excellent, and the first story was quite good. I also like the western theme (although the stories are purely science fiction and couldn't be written to fit into the Old West). I especially like the way they combined the US and Chinese language/culture/society. They have to emphasize the English parts for the dialogue, of course, but it still holds the right flavor.
I approve!
Show Comments »
Firefly was good.
Serenity was better.
I like how the series tried to break the mold.
Example:
- A horse, used as cover, was shot. (You never see that in TV)
posted by
Jeremy on August 6, 2007 06:51 AM
Yeah, good point. There are several points that don't follow the typical television conventions.
posted by
Nathan on August 6, 2007 07:45 AM
« Hide Comments
July 10, 2007
I was one of the few who never gave up on the Iraq War, even when it was fashionable to write it off. Things are turning around now, and it looks like Iraq will be stable before this decade ends.
I was also one of the minority who never bought into human-caused global warming, or the even less-specific human-caused climate change.
So why aren't the rest of you figuring out how much fun Jagged Alliance 2 is, yet? Trust me, I'm not wrong on these things, I'm just ahead of the social power curve.
Show Comments »
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April 08, 2007
November 24, 2006
Test your discrimination.
Not safe for work if your boss is looking over your shoulder, but nothing you'll get fired for. Probably. Best to wait until you are browsing from home.
I got 80%.
In 5 cases, ones I thought were augmented were real. In one case only, what I thought was real was augmented. Not too shabby.
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July 19, 2005
So how do you know when it's really love?
They* say you'll know it when you feel it...but if you've never actually felt a true love**, don't you often fool yourself that the infatuation you are feeling is truly love?
Is the difference truly qualitative? Every "true love checklist" I've seen is filled with subjective items...is there one with objective criteria anywhere?
The closest I've come to the objective criteria is:
1) Character matters. You can change lots of things about yourself, but character is nearly impossible to make any substantive changes.
2) Anyone can be nice for a few weeks, or even a few months. Date for the long haul, and don't do anything (i.e., have sex) that might make a necessary parting more difficult (or impossible) to effect
3) If anything about the person you feel you love makes you feel uncomfortable, resolve it ASAP...or break up. No, you probably cannot change them later. And as harsh as it may sound, it is better to go through life alone than to settle for anything less than the right person for you.
Anyone else?
Read More "Love" »
*You know who "they" are, don't you? The Van Pattens.
**True Love: a love in which you truly forget yourself, and each partner places the other first, creating a mutually interdependent relationship, like an arch.
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Well put, well said. I have opted for the "alone" route after numerous unhappy relationships. There are worse things. Me and the 2 kitty cats (a cliche for sure) are content and happy with each other's company and my wide circle of good friends (male and female) are all that I need at this point in my life.
posted by
Gayle on July 19, 2005 05:58 AM
The one phrase, ( and I'm not sure where I heard it ) was not that you love them in spite of their faults. But you love them for their faults.
In a way it's true. When I think of all the things my husband does that could just drive me crazy . I think of him without doing them. I would be crazier. Because then he wouldn't be himself.
He will however tell you he has not faults. He's a Texan. hahahaha
posted by
MorningSun on July 20, 2005 12:08 PM
I think love means like when you are able to quit at the one you love if for him/her it is better without you. If you are able to suffer a bad thing and that means for the other one is a good thing.
posted by
Missy on July 21, 2005 07:15 AM
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June 07, 2005
Okay, this is pretty much just a message to the guys. I know it may piss off some female readers, but them's the breaks.
Over at Kausfiles, Mickey quotes this anecdote:
[Sen. John] Tower, who was a friend of my father, had attempted to sexually assault me when I was 18 and a college freshman. Embarrassed and ashamed, I had kept this story a closely guarded secret for years.
Do you think she knew the words "sexual assault" when she was 18? That sure sounds like a cognate (if I'm using the word correctly) introduced more recently. Say, in the mid-90s, when it began to be okay for a female who regretted consensual sex to claim "date rape", and to treat such accusations as a convictable offense.
However, as the bio I link mentions, he died in 1991 in a plane crash...so he can't defend himself at all. She can, so I'd like to actually explore a little bit what I think happened.
She says he "attempted sexual assault". Well, "sexual assault", if I understand correctly, is the way you describe "attempted rape". So since he only attempted a sexual assault, she is literally saying that he attempted to attempt to force sex on her. That means he didn't actually succeed in trying to force sex on her, right? Chaining that together, it is pretty clear that he made an unwelcome advance, and she said no, and he desisted. She might have had to say no 2-3 times, but by her own words, he didn't actually sexually assault her. But she couches it in terms of criminal behavior.
Senator Tower, being a Senator, had power. Our society (and biology?) has developed so that women generally exhibit attraction to a man with power, and younger women sometimes exhibit attraction to older men. As I'm fond of pointing out, one of my favorite quotes ever was this exchange between female co-workers at a restaurant:
girl 1: Is he...attractive?
girl 2 (17-years-old): Atractive? He's 27!
And none of the other girls within earshot reacted, which says something.
So here's the point. Guys want sex, for the most part. It's the way we are wired. But biology is not destiny. If you concentrate on it and work at it, you can move past your more base instincts.
And it would be to your benefit to turn off your focus on sex. For multiple reasons.
First, you don't get in trouble with your SO for girl-gazing.
Second, you don't get in trouble because light flirting with another woman turns into something too serious.
Third, you don't have your body writing checks your heart can't cash (as in, how many guys are in a committed relationship because of the method recounted in this post?).
Fourth, you don't end up mis-interpreting a young girl's admiration as something sexual, and so don't end up having someone make accusations of you attempting a sexual assault.
Even though Senator Tower is dead and can't defend himself, this is the sort of accusation in which what the female feels is much more important that what actually happened. But if you try to defend yourself (or someone else) by saying so, you are castigated and shouted down for having the gall to blame the victim...even if what you are trying to do is question whether she actually is a victim at all. A staggering number of women actually do deliberately lie about these sort of things for their own advantage. An additional staggering number of women are able to convince themselves (each other?) that it did happen so that no longer is a deliberate lie.
Since, under the current societal standards, you can't actually use those last two points to defend yourself, if you find yourself in that situation, you are screwed...just not in the way you had originally hoped. It is better by far to just train yourself to not think about or care about sex outside of a marriage.
I know this is not a popular message, even among Christians these days. But the simple fact is: you will have a far happier, content, successful, and peaceful life if you follow the 10 Commandments to the best of your ability.*
Read More "Why You Shouldn't Center Your Life Around Sex" »
And I'm convinced (through some experimentation and observation) that no other religion's shorthand rules can come close to giving you such happiness, contentment, success, and peace. It's why I'm a Christian. It kind of cuts through the "What is Truth?" crap the sophists love so much.
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posted by Nathan on
10:10 AM
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March 12, 2005
In reaction to Ann's comment on this post
At one point in my life, I was $16,000 in debt. Not that much, except that my various debts added up to about $800/month in payments, and my take-home pay was about $1000/month. Rather than trying to consolidate my debt, I chose to pay between $900-950 every month to pay down the smallest debt ($500), then once that was paid down to zero, I used that money to pay down the next smallest debt...
...I probably could have chosen the one with the highest interest rate...
But it worked out pretty well. I was completely out of debt within 3 years. If the math doesn't add up, well, I did sometimes do things like buy a car for $500, buy a plane ticket, etc, after saving up a little.
That's where I learned to live within my means, and a big key to that was anytime I wanted to make a purchase, I waited. The bigger the purchase, the longer I waited. I learned this because once or twice I blew $40 or so on a big purchase that I later wished I didn't. Nearly an entire months' discretionary spending on one item I didn't even like!!! So the bigger the purchase, the longer I wait.
The first two years of paying down the debt were not fun. About the time I got to the 3rd year, I got a new roommate. He had borrowed $10,000 from his mother-in-law to start a business, and the business failed. Then he and his wife divorced. He made a few payments, then "just got tired of not having any money" (paying about $500 a month out of the same $1000 after-tax income toward his debt), and declared bankruptcy. After declaring bankruptcy, he sold the equipment from his business and was able to keep the money, as I recall (although I could be wrong). 3 months later he bought a 2-year-old Nissan Pathfinder on credit.
Now, I guess he pretty much learned his lesson. He didn't overspend, and to the best of my knowledge never came close to bankruptcy again.
But I remember being bitterly disappointed, not that I didn't declare bankruptcy, but that all my sacrifice to do the right thing earned me pretty much nothing. One loan that I had had gone into default while I was at basic training, but I made arrangements and paid back every dime and all the penalties...but due to the wording of the student loan company, for the next 5 years, every time I tried to get credit I had to answer questions about why I had applied for bankruptcy, even though it was obvious I had never declared.
Now, they *did* always extend credit, and after 7 years, I was able to buy a new car and a house...
But I still feel very keenly that it just seemed irritating and frustrating that all my sacrifice earned me nothing...He could buy new computers, computer games, a fairly-new car, CDs, new clothes, everything...and I had to be careful and plan ahead getting to eat out at McDonald's, and drove a car that the passenger side floor had rusted through so you could see the road through it.
So I have some touchy emotions about bankruptcy.
I do think I learned more from my experience. I think my experience refined my character quite a bit, and the effect on my soul/spirit/character was certainly a benefit I wasn't considering at the time. I do feel it was better to do it my way than his.
This experience is one of the reasons I'm a conservative. Hard work and self-reliance are better. He stuck it to his mother-in-law because he could. His pain was eased...but what pain did he force on her against her will?
When someone gets "help" from the government, it always comes from other people. Sure, maybe Bob Roe's welfare only costs me some fraction of a penny per year....but there are tens of thousands of "Bob Roe"s, and they are taking money from literally millions and millions of the rest of us. For no good reason, other than most of the "Bob Roe"s think work is too hard, or think 'fast food' is beneath them. They have a choice of trying to work hard (or risk themselves to overcome a disability), or just take my money. We don't have the choice whether we give it or not. ...except that enough people vote for liberals who raise taxes and increase programs that I have no choice (although I can, and do, vote to try and change it). But the idea of liberal "compassion" rings hollow when you consider the amount of force involved in conjunction with the lack of self-sacrifice demonstrated by those who vote for more welfare programs.
Bankruptcy is pretty much another form of welfare, these days. Not in all cases, obviously. There are people who do break, and bankruptcy can help them rebuild their life. I just get angry that all my expenses are greater (interest rates, prices, etc) as businesses try to recoup the losses incurred by the type of person Ann describes.
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posted by Nathan on
09:19 AM
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January 25, 2005
I have made a point of totally discounting anyone who uses the phrase "Speaking Truth to Power" as a near-complete socio-political idiot.
Let's see how that's working for me, shall we?
Great Moments in Higher Education*
Here's an interesting angle on the Larry Summers kerfuffle. The Santa Cruz (Calif.) Sentinel notes that one of the Harvard president's harshest foes is Denice Dee Denton, the new chancellor of the University of California at Santa Cruz:
Denton is making headlines . . . for challenging controversial statements made by Harvard University President Larry Summers, who suggested that innate differences between the sexes could help explain why fewer women succeed in science and math careers.
Summers made the comments . . . at an economic conference attended by Denton. Denton questioned Summers sharply during the conference, saying she needed to "speak truth to power." She told the Harvard president that she believed his assertions had been contradicted by research materials presented at the conference.
The Sentinel reports that the alliterative administrator has taken a very personal interest in the advancement of female scientists:
The University of California created a $192,000-a-year job for the partner of the new UC Santa Cruz chancellor, a move that is being criticized by employee unions. . . .
UC officials defended hiring Gretchen Kalonji, the longtime partner of incoming Santa Cruz Chancellor Denice Dee Denton. They described Kalonji as a highly qualified professor who will be an asset in her new job as director of international strategy development.
Kalonji, a professor of materials science at the University of Washington in Seattle and an expert in international education, also is getting a tenured professorship, perhaps at UCSC.
In case the meaning isn't clear, that's "partner" as in a Boston marriage. A Sentinel editorial takes the unions' side, saying UC owes "a public accounting of why this job is so important," and noting: "So far as we can figure out, UCSC has never had a 'director of international development,' and a reasonable person would ask why that's so important now."
Yep, it was 100% in this case, too. Advantage: Brain Fertilizer!
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Nepotism/favoritism sucks. I'll never forget when our fixed ops manager had an affair with an admin assistant...his wife fell apart. So, the company created a job (that had never existed before) for his wife, gave her the office next to his, and installed a WINDOW inbetween the two offices so she could keep an eye on him. She got PAID to sit and watch the husband who earns six digits.
I got a .25 raise that year.
posted by
Jo on January 25, 2005 03:15 PM
After high school ended I left (fled) Santa Cruz because of the very reasons Ms. Denton is able to say and do as she pleases. If you lean right, you're always wrong. If you lean left, anything you say (i.e. "speak truth to power"), or anything you do (Nepotism, wasting Taxpayer/University funds, etc), no matter how idiotic or self-serving they may be, is allowed and defended because... (add your favorite liberal excuse here). Trust me, I've heard them all.
Every story I ever hear coming out of Santa Cruz usually falls under the 'Laughable Cook Fringe' page of a News Paper.
It's sad that such a beautiful coastal town is full of people who prefer admiring their so-called intellect instead of admiring great waves, prestine bay, and giant redwood groves. Evolution may be preached in that town, but it has yet to take effect.
posted by
Tony on January 26, 2005 10:15 AM
Jo, that guy must have been a huge asset (or at least 60% of one) to the company if they were willing to spend that kind of money. I would sooner have fired the sum'bitch and/or quietly encouraged his wife to kick him out of the house and sue for a huge alimony (and child support?) regime.
posted by
McGehee on January 26, 2005 11:07 AM
He was a year away from retirement, I often think that had a lot to do with it.
posted by
Jo on January 26, 2005 02:35 PM
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posted by Nathan on
02:28 PM
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Comments (4)
January 14, 2005
Is there really no simple explanation of mortgages and housebuying on the web?
The reason why I ask is that three years ago I decided to buy a house. I was receiving a monthly housing allowance of $800, and I didn't see how I could pay nearly $30,000 on a house loan and not make money, even if the house's sale price remained flat. If I rented, that money would just go to a landlord and I'd have nothing to show for it, but if I purchased, that $30,000 would go into my pocket.
Wouldn't it?
I'd heard that if you buy a house, you need to live in it a minimum of three years to even break even, and five years to build up any real equity.
So I took the plunge. And I got lucky.
Here's what I've learned:
Read More "Mortgages" »
Let's say you buy a house for $250k, with a down payment of $50k. The closing costs on that are going to be somewhere in the neighborhood of $5000 or so. Part of that includes paying money up front for a lower interest rate, so it's not all lost, but the shorter time you own the house, the less worth it is to "pay down the interest", i.e., "points". I may get into that later.
So you start out $5000 in the hole already.
You've got that $200,000 loan. If you do it for 15 years, I think your payments are around $1500 a month. Wow, eh? $1500/month should pay that loan down to nothing real quick, right? In fact, you do the math and is should be paid off in less than 8 years. So why does it take 15?
Have you looked at an amortization scedule lately? Your first month, the $1500 gets divided and something like $780 goes to interest, and and $720 to the principle. In fact, by the end of the first year, after shelling out $18,000, you've probably paid your loan down a whopping $300 or so. $17,700 of it went to the bank for interest. The second year you pay the loan down about $600, and it slowly goes up from there. You pay the bulk of the loan back in the last three years.
That's why it's vital to pay extra on the loan to pay it down as quickly as possible, because you an amazingly less amount of interest.
But I digress.
So take your house. In the three years you've owned it, you have paid down the loan less than $3000. You've been unlucky and the housing market has been flat the entire time, so you sell your $250k house for $250k. You still owe $247k, for a grand total profit of $3000! But wait, you started $5000 in the hole because of closing costs, right? And in selling, you have to put another $5000 or so fixing up the house, painting over the crayon marks, replacing the carpeting your daughter's gastric juices bleached out... And don't forget to pay the selling agent his 6% commission, which would thus be about $14k. So you made $3000 on the house, but lost about $24k on fees and expenses associated with buying and selling a house, for a grand total impact on your pocketbook of negative 21 Thousand Dollars!
Sort of. Don't forget taxes. Remember that $18k that went to the bank the first year? And the $17k that they pocketed the next year? Sucks, doesn't it? Well, the govt agrees, and so they don't make you pay taxes on it. Write off $18000 of your earned income from your taxes that year, saving you probably about $6000. For three years, that means you saved $18000 in taxes, meaning you are only $3000 in the hole now.
And I assumed a flat market for ease of computation and worst-case scenario. It's not hard to think that the market is going to go up at least $3000 on a $250k house over three years. If for some reason it does, rent out the house for 18 months, and the renters pay down your loan to the point were all these expenses vs remaining principle is in your favor and you almost cannot lose money.
So if you want to buy a house but aren't sure you can stay more than 3 years, what do you do?
First, buy a house in good structural condition with cosmetic problems. You can get a house with bad carpeting and a bad paint job for $15000 less than the market, probably, and do those things yourself for less than $5000, especially if you do the engineered wood flooring (cheaper than carpet and lasts longer). That's sweat equity of $10000 you just made for your effort.
Second, buy less than you can afford. My housing allowance in Hawaii is going to end up being something like $2600/month. I supposedly could afford a $400,000 house. But if the housing market doesn't go up, I could lose lots.
So I'm probably going to buy a $200,000 condo in okay shape and work to fix it up. Plus the maintenance association fees add on to the monthly payment, and taxes, and utilities, leaving me about $600 extra a month to pay down the loan. And remember, that's a housing allowance. That means even with a flat housing market, I'll make at least $10000 dollars after 3 years, absolute worst-case scenario And maybe as much as $50,000 if things go well.
I'll keep you posted on it.
Now you should understand why owning a house 3 years or less is a bad risk, but 5 years or more is nearly a guaranteed profit.
Is there a mortgage website that explains any of this? I never found one. I hope you can learn from my experience so as to make better decisions.
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I'm confused.
The principal is the amount of the original loan. In the $15,000 a month pay schedule, you cite $720 going towards paying down the principle. If that $720 is going towards paying down what you owe, then by the end of the year you should have paid down about $8,500 or so on the house. So I'm not quite understanding what you mean by only $300 going towards paying down the loan?
posted by
R. Alex on January 15, 2005 10:56 AM
I think mortgage-related information is one of those annoying things where everyone who might give you nicely laid out and clear information has a vested interest in selling you something; house or mortgage most likely, and therefore has an interest in obfuscating things.
Or not. Maybe it's all written by financial geeks who know things that they assume everyone else does, so they don't explain it clearly. The kind of thing also common with computer geeks.
posted by
Jay on January 15, 2005 02:30 PM
When we first went house hunting, we had on the top of our list that the house should have a sagging porch, because I had helped my father repair one such when I was ten, and still had access to the screw jacks.
Turned out we bought one without such, did barely nothing to improve it, and sold it 19 years later, as is, for six times the original purchase price. The trick is to watch the real estate trends and buy out in front of them.
posted by
triticale on January 17, 2005 03:56 PM
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posted by Nathan on
07:48 AM
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Comments (3)
October 22, 2004
I’ve learned a few things over the years…
One of the things I’ve come to realize is that there are a hundred things* that a guy does that are fine and perfectly okay…until he moves in with a woman. Objectively, there really is nothing wrong with leaving your clothes on the floor for a week, or sorting underwear by scent…but it is wrong in her eyes. The reverse is just as true: there’s nothing wrong with re-decorating or throwing out old things…unless your redecoration is the equivalent of a dog urinating on a hydrant, i.e., to leave a mark of your presence to establish territory and cover up any previous marks.
Sure, those are both stereotypical examples…meaning, there’s probably some basis for truth, but nothing you’d want to hang your hat on.
The point is, the definition of “right” and “wrong” changes when you enter a relationship, and changes even more if you live together (not to mention if you marry…although I usually hope the initiating of co-habitation and marriage occur simultaneously, I’m also not so naïve to expect it…). When you tell someone you love them, you accept a certain responsibility toward meeting their expectations and attempting to please them. You tacitly accept that you may well have to alter some of your customs and practices in order to make the deepening of your relationship go smoothly.
As such, many of the things that you do that aren’t wrong when you are single do become wrong when you are part of a couple. If you want the relationship to continue and thrive, you should probably take some time to actually discuss likes, dislikes, and pet peeves and see what problems you can easily avoid with a word to the wise.
As such, I’ve learned some of the things that contribute to a deep and lasting love. I think, first and foremost, you really should be friends, and your characters should be in harmony. The best way to make sure infatuation isn’t fooling you about those two aspects is simply: time. Yeah, you can wait too long, but not waiting long enough usually leads to far worse disasters. And the other trait I think is most important is “willingness”. If you partner is willing, and you are willing, there are no difficulties you cannot resolve. The moment intransigence rears its ugly head, you are heading for trouble. Not insurmountable trouble, necessarily, but a fairly unenjoyable period of time, nonetheless.
Take the preceding for what it’s worth to you.
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When I'm asked about marriage advice (which is, admittedly, not often because of my less-than-stellar record) here are the two things I make sure I state (from my own experiences):
1) You must spend time together to learn the other party's idosyncracies. If, for instance, it drives you completely batshit that the toilet paper roll is upside down, and your intended does this -- TAKE IT UNDER SERIOUS ADVISEMENT. I'm completely and totally serious, here. Because it is my humble opinion that when you cohabitate you must have compatible living styles, and, after the warm glow of infatuation has worn off, it's the little things that will make you crazy. If you know all about your intended's little idiosyncracies and they fall under the heading of "Not Such a Big Deal" then you won't wind up blowing your stack and having huge arguments over ridiculous, petty things.
2) Listen. Don't just hear, LISTEN. I would hazard a guess that out of 100 arguments, 99 of them are not born from anger, they're born from hurt feelings. I can't stand the psychobabble bullshit of "listen, then repeat what your partner says" but if that works for you, fine. Most of the time, the marriages I've seen fail failed from atrophy. Taking the other one for granted.
For me, personally, I happen to think that for a relationship to succeed, both parties have to think they're the lucky one. When my hubby and I got together I told him: "I don't know what makes a marriage work; only what makes one fail." It was the most honest thing I'd ever uttered. But after nearly three years of marriage, I think I might have picked up a thing or two.
And, just so's you know: I happen to think I'm the luckiest woman on the planet. :: grin ::
Finally -- on a more personal note. Take heart, Nathan. I really honestly believe that we learn the most about ourselves, grow the most, and find out what we're made up of -- not by the happy times -- but by the sad ones.
xoxo
M
posted by
Margi on October 23, 2004 01:08 AM
I agree with Margi. Nathan, one of the most difficult times in my life and marriage, yielded the sweetest fruit.
It can be very hard to accept others as they are and where they are; to truly revel in their inherent being. We sometimes want the other to be just like us and then are astounded when they attempt to accomplish the same thing.
Praying.
posted by
Rae on October 23, 2004 12:42 PM
Good advice, too, Margi...but this isn't what you think it is. I just have times when I give unsolicited advice based on what I've learned. I mentioned that about the very definition of right/wrong and good/bad changing when you enter a relationship to a friend, and she thought I should post it, so I did, and just added a little bit more to spice it up. That's all.
posted by
Nathan on October 23, 2004 07:03 PM
Rae,
Prayers are always appreciated. Right now, pray that everything proceeds smoothly.
posted by
Nathan on October 23, 2004 07:04 PM
I wasn't making an assumption; I apologize if it sounded like I was. I happen to think you're awfully nice and you deserve every happiness. :)
posted by
Margi on October 23, 2004 07:36 PM
My patience level dropped off somewhere, Lord knows where. I realized it most strongly last weekend. We picked of a Saturday paper and went to the coffee house, I had MT save us a seat while I waited in line. Well, I waited and waited and ordered and waited and fixed the coffee and took it to the table and waited some more for the food and went back to the table eventually.
I sat down, read section A, and MT suggested we go, we had barn chores to get to. I bussed the table and walked our dishes to the dish totes and turned around and MT had gotten rid of the paper. Of course, I hadn't had time to finish it.
And I freaked out. almost cried. Over a paper that cost .50. He offered to fetch it out of the recycle (it now mingled with communal papers) or buy another one, neither of these options seemed acceptable to me...one would seem like stealing, the other a waste of $.
Anyway, I think when you're with someone every day and every night, sometimes you end up losing all the tolernace you had before. In my case, my reaction was totally stupid. But it happened nonetheless.
posted by
Jo on October 25, 2004 07:34 AM
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posted by Nathan on
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August 31, 2004
Well, this "Brain Fertilizer Way" is not well-developed, to tell the truth. Mainly because I still have never finished a novel, so how can I say for sure what works?
But Rae asks some serious questions about my basic approach to writing, and how can I refuse her anything?
So here goes:
Short story writing is a good way to get your feet wet in actually getting stuff written. But it really doesn't help at all in writing a novel. Sure, you can work on word choice, dialogue, scene-setting, and so forth, but they really are two different animals, much like the difference between a sprint and a marathon.
You can write a short story in one sitting. You can (and should!) write a short story with the intent to explore one idea, and everything you do should be subordinate to that idea. Dialogue, character revelation, scene-setting, all should be subordinate to that one idea. You just don't have room for much else.
Whereas a novel gives you much more space to work with. Not only do you have room to explore related and subordinate ideas, a novel demands that you do so. You cannot usually sustain an entire novel with just one idea. But the trade-off is that you can explore more complex issues from several different directions, you can fully develope multiple important characters, you can have rich subplots, you can really heighten tension with delayed resolutions.
For me, however, one of my biggest difficulties is in holding a complete novel story in my head. When conceiving of a novel, I usually think of a problem, or beginning, or hook, and then I have the resolution/end-state clear, but the middle is this big, fuzzy, "something happens" area. I then work from both ends to try and clear up the middle fuzziness, but at some point I have to start writing because that's the only way to see if what I have planned will work or not. I've abandoned at least three novels because my writing skills were insufficient to resolve that middle gray area. The only things I could think of were implausible even to me.
But this novel is different. I've restarted it at least three times (this is the 4th iteration), but each time I clear up some specific problems for myself. I have a good idea of what I want to do at each stage of the novel, and all aspects work together to underscore the main idea I have in mind. Sure, I still don't know how many minor characters I'm going to have or what they're going to do, much less what their names are...but I have such a clear storyline in my head that even if the minor characters do some things I'm not expecting right now, I don't think they can take over the novel.
The only real outline I have is in my head, although I do have a listing of the things I want to have happen in each chapter.
Right now, I'm thinking of each chapter as a bucket of 3,000 words that I have to fill. I'm doing that for pacing and motivation. If I cover all the action in less than 3000 words, then I have to add more words of description. If I take 5000 words to cover everything, I'm going to consider if some of it can't move into an adjacent chapter. I may end up abandoning this attempt, as well, and trying a different way, but even if I do, I will have learned something about writing.
To date, I've learned alot about subplots, foreshadowing, pacing, dialogue, "showing not telling", obstacles to writing, the dangers of momentum, etc. I've shared much of it in this blog and in previous blogs whose archives are lost in the mists of time [alas!], but I'll share with you all as I learn more, and maybe even revisit some of the things I'd learned previously.
The thing is, I think the lessons learned in writing are very personal and performance-based. I can read an excellent book on writing, like the ones written by Lawrence Block, but they can really do no more than give me an idea of the problems I will encounter on my own. They can't really give me any solutions, or help me avoid problems in the first place.
The physical act of typing on a keyboard is not difficult. The process of considering, developing, deciding, critiquing, adjusting, rewriting, and accepting the final product in writing a novel is quite difficult, and may be one of the most difficult things to do in life. You risk your self-esteem. You open up old wounds within yourself. You grow as much as your characters do.
Yeah, it's hard. Don't let anyone tell you differently. But the most worthwhile things in life are hard to obtain. The most worthwhile things in life are worth the effort. Do you want to be a writer? Then the pain and difficulty and effort will be worth it. It may take me 60 years to finish my novel. It will still be worth it.
I admit that I'm not exactly in a rush. I have a family with two young children, a career, a rich life of hobbies (including marksmanship, strategy wargames, reading, guitar, language, and exercise) that take up much time. I want to be a professional writer by the time I finish my military career, partially because finishing my military career dovetails nicely into being a professional writer, in that I can live off of my military retirement if necessary (albeit only simply), so the pension acts as a nice safety net to fill in the times of slow income. I have about 10 years, then, to finish and sell at least my first novel, if not 3-5. But the later ones will take care of themselves. I've got to finish this one first.
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Bravo! Nathan, that was very informative. Thank you. Now, more questions:
1) How do you keep count of your words? Do you have a program that does this?
2) Do you think that some are more "geared" toward a certain style or genre? What is yours?
3)Is your wife supportive of your attempt? If she isn't, how do you reconcile it in yourself?
4)John Grisham once said that he wouldn't write anything that would be embarrassing for his mother and grandmother to read or for him to read aloud to them. Knowing you are a Christian, do you feel your worldview affects your language selection and development of characters and situations?
5)Do you attend writers conferences or communicate with other writers or are you more of a loner?
6)Do you use personal experiences or interesting stories from other people as springboards into characters or character situations?
7)How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll tootsie pop ?
;)Thanks, Nathan.
posted by
Rae on September 2, 2004 03:20 PM
You know, several days later, I just read the "how can I refuse her anything?" Ahhh, that was so nice, me blogger friend.
Now, the above questions Mr?
posted by
Rae on September 6, 2004 08:12 PM
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posted by Nathan on
09:07 AM
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Comments (2)
August 17, 2004
This post is closely related to yesterday's about running. I ain't talking about yoga here, folks.
Any time you talk about stretching in relation to exercise, you should at least address the controversy: to stretch or not to stretch?
Personally, I say don't stretch. At least, not before you exercise. I used to stretch to a count of 15 for each major muscle group before exercising, and to a count of 10 afterwards. Then I read an article that insisted warming up beforehand had both beneficial and harmful effects, and so the result was pretty much a wash. See, loosening up the muscles may lessen the chance of a pulled muscle, but since the muscles are looser, your joints don't have as much support and so you are probably equally increasing the chance for an injury to your connective tissue.
So I stopped stretching beforehand, and I did notice a minor improvement on my 2-mile time, but well within margins of error to possibly be imagination. And yet, and yet: no injuries. None. I'm close to 40 years old, run quite a bit, and I've never had a problem with pulled muscles, painful knees, or shin splints. Then again, maybe I'm just lucky?
A few years later, I was trying to increase my flexibility, because I could barely touch my toes. I had never stopped stretching after exercising, so I started increasing the stretch time to a ver-r-ry slow 40 count. I also always bend my knees slightly...I think locking the knees while stretching is a bad idea, personally.
My flexibility has increased to the point that I feel like I'm getting the best of both worlds: I am more flexible before stretching than most guys are after stretching, so I feel like I'm not risking any pulled muscles, but my joints are still protected by not having my muscles too loose.
In any case, it works for me. Your mileage may vary.
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I avoid both stretching and exercise so I need worry about none of that.
Pass the Fritos please.
posted by
Sharp as a Marble on August 17, 2004 01:02 PM
Ummm, careful. You don't want to pull something.
posted by
Nathan on August 17, 2004 01:41 PM
OW! I got salt in a paper cut!
posted by
Sharp as a Marble on August 17, 2004 04:20 PM
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posted by Nathan on
12:54 PM
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Comments (3)
August 16, 2004
All you need is a decent motorized treadmill.
What you do is choose the time you want to run for a certain distance. If you want to, say, run two miles in 13 minutes, you set the treadmill speed for a 6:30 mile. Obviously, your goal should be realistic. If you are 60 years old and 70 pounds overweight, a 5-minute mile is not an advisable goal. Be smart, because dumb choices are your own responsibility.
If your treadmill has an incline function, set the incline somewhere between 1.5 and 3, since running on a powered treadmill is somewhat easier than on a flat, non-moving surface.
Start running. Run as far as you can at the pace you want to reach. It really doesn't matter if you can only run a quarter-mile or half-mile at that speed before collapsing. When you run next, whether the next day or the day after (but don't go more than 48 hours without running if you are serious about improving your run time), you should try to go at least a little bit farther. When you can't run any more at that speed, drop the speed down to a pace you can maintain and finish out the distance.
You won't see much improvement the first few days. But if you run every day, you should meet your goal within 2-3 weeks, depending on the distance and desired goal of improvement.
This method works because the treadmill trains your legs, lungs, and body to go at a certain pace. You become conditioned to that speed and will do it automatically even when you don't have a powered surface moving beneath you that forces you to maintain the pace. If you slow down while running on a track, nothing happens except that you slow down...and your body doesn't get the chance to learn to maintain that pace. But if you slow down on the treadmill, you immediately feel yourself drifting away from the console, and can adjust your pace again to keep up. Even more importantly, if you don't speed up again, you actually will fall off the treadmill and possibly hurt yourself. That's a nice little reason to keep up the pace, eh?
If you decide to try this, let me know how it goes for you.
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Hey I tried this running program, works great for me. I managed to up my run time by two minutes. Thanks.
posted by
Tracy on September 15, 2004 05:35 AM
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posted by Nathan on
01:10 PM
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Comments (1)
June 23, 2004
I had to get up four hours early this morning, so I went to bed three hours early last night. Normally, it would be impossible for me to sleep so early...I can usually stay up later but not go to bed significantly earlier.
So I tried out the Brainfertilizer Method again. This time it took six times counting back from 30 before I fell asleep. Furthermore, I woke up after an hour, and my body said, "Nice nap! Let's get up!" So I did the Method again and was able to fall asleep after just two iterations. Finally, I had a bad dream and woke up in the middle of my night...so I counted back from 20 and was asleep before I hit number "8".
It seems to work, for me at least. Let me know of your successes or failures using this method.
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My treatment for this week's bout of insomnia has been cucumber. I garnish it with ice, ginger ale, and some of that nice syrup Mr. Pimm puts up (this is known as "proper seasonal accompaniment" in my adopted home). Works like a charm.
I've been following your method with interest, but those counting things have never worked for me. I just end up going ...15...14...Why do people have to be such idiots at staff meetings? Is it that hard to follow the agenda?...oh yeah, tryin' to sleep...uhhhh...14?...13.... Glad it works for you, though.
posted by
Sean Kinsell on June 24, 2004 09:10 AM
I have had the same results as Shawn, incidentally. So, instead I switched to Handels Sonata #5, movement 3, over and over in my head visualizing the notes until I am so bored I zonk out.
posted by
Jo on June 24, 2004 12:16 PM
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posted by Nathan on
07:47 PM
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Comments (2)
June 21, 2004
To start with, let me just say that I am slightly disturbed by the huge leap one must take from high school to college in our nation. Our high schools lag behind many nations' high schools in knowledge achievement, but our universities are the best in the world. As a result, there is a larger gap in demands from our high schools to our colleges. I don't really want to lower our college standards, but I would like to raise high school standards. However, that is another topic for another day.
It impacts today's subject in this manner: I think it is very unfair to our children to expect that after mandatory attendance in high school, they must deal with too many new situations, experiences, and temptations, while simultaneously being largely fully responsible for themselves for the first time, and still be able to choose the proper major for the career(s) they will pursue for the rest of their life. This is made more difficult since most of the college students right out of high school have no real work-experience other than fast food or perhaps retail clerking. Oh, yeah: the bulk of these students are also living hand-to-mouth and/or working part-time jobs just to have enough to eat.
Here is what I'm going to teach my children:
Read More "The Brainfertilizer Plan for Affordable College" »
You must obtain a college degree, and you will be best prepared in life if you continue to pursue higher degrees. You will have to sacrifice to do this. But right now we are most concerned with your intial Bachelor's Degree.
But unless you are skilled enough in sports to have a realistic chance at a professional career (and thus are risking eroding your skills through disuse if you don't go to college immediately), there is no reason you actually need to attend college right after graduating high school.
Perhaps the best method for preparing yourself for your adult life would be to enlist in the military. At one time, the minimum enlistment was two years, but now I think you have to do four years. While that may seem like a long time, it really isn't. It will allow you to learn skills and discipline that you can use throughout your entire life, to earn some great benefits for college, and allow you to buy a decent car, nice clothes, good computer, etc, before you enter college, so you won't live like a pauper for five years. In addition, your training will probably give you college credits, and while you are in the military, the military will pay for you to attend classes in your time off or take tests for college credit (AP, CLEP, and Dantes).
If you would prefer not to spend that many years in the military, you can also sign up for the reserves. You will spend approximately a year between basic training and advanced (skill/job) training, but the commitment is far lighter for the next few years. Many state National Guard units will also pay for much of your college, as well.
If you sign up for the Montgomery GI Bill when you enlist, you will pay $100 each month for the first year, but then when you attend college, the government will pay you approximately $600/month if you attend college part time and nearly $1000/month if you attend full time (which is 12 hours, minimum). Unfortunately, you can't get any of it in advance to pay for your school, it is best used for living expenses like rent and food.
Some states offer extra benefits if you enlist in that state and then attend a state school. In particular, the best are Texas and Illinois, which will allow you to attend any state school for free if you enlist there.
However, in many ways it is better to be an officer than enlisted. More responsibility is demanded of you, but you also are paid better...much better, and there are other benefits, as well. If you have decent grades in high school, you can apply for an ROTC scholarship. In addition to paying for your school, they give you a small stipend each month. When you graduate, you are guaranteed a good job that will give you "management"/supervisory experience that is invaluable in most career fields, and you'll get that experience much earlier than you could in the civilian world. It is demanding, but most people feel it is worth the sacrifices.
But it is true that not everyone wants to join the military. Even among those who want to, not everyone can join the military, for physical reasons. Not everyone has the mental strength to make it through basic training or deal with the loss of some rights that others take for granted. And do not fool yourself: you may be forced to fight, or to deploy away from your family to support the fighters. You may end up risking your life or being killed. If you cannot endure that possibility, do not enlist.
However, don't forget the Coast Guard. You won't get sent to war, you will certainly be assigned to somewhere near water, with a darn good chance to be placed at some of the most beautiful beaches in the nation...and you still get all the benefits of military service.
If the military isn't for you, you must plan ahead in high school, and ensure that you work hard in academic, sports, and artistic endeavors. If you can get a full scholarship (tuition, fees, room, board, and books) on the basis of any skill, by all means, go ahead.
However, if you did not perform well in high school, or simply were unable to obtain a full scholarship, there is still no reason to go heavily in debt, put your parents heavily in debt, or starve yourself to be able to afford college.
The most important part of college is the knowledge you gain. The name of the college is important...to an extent. However, any prospective employers only care about your last level of achievement. They don't care about what you did in High School if you are applying for jobs that require a college degree. Likewise, they don't care where you completed your freshman and sophomore classes. So go to a junior college. The cost is a fraction of what a major university charges, and the information is the same, thanks to accreditation standards. Heck, at most major universities, your first two years are spent in huge classes with Teaching Assistants standing in for the assigned professor; you'll get more personal attention at a junior college. Junior College also gives you a second chance to excel if your high school grades or ACT/SAT score weren't excellent...a 3.8 or 4.0 at your junior college is within the grasp of most people who apply themselves, and such a performance can also net you full-ride academic scholarships at a major university.
Finally, if paying for even the last 2-3 upper-class years of college are still problematic, you might consider trying to find a decent job with your Associate's Degree from junior college, and attending college on nights and weekends. You would probably be unable to obtain a specialized degree like music or physics or microbiology, but general degrees like business, english, history, teaching, are quite easy to obtain that way.
This won't solve everyone's problems. Not everyone will be able to attend college. Not everyone can afford college. But this is at least another way to look at making college as affordable as possible.
Parents: One idea I saw in Wealth Without Risk, by Charles J. Givens, that I really liked was:
If you can afford the down payment (and perhaps some part of the monthly payments), purchase a multi-room house near the college your child will attend. Even better if you can convince allwill have to deal with problems, but even such experiences will help prepare them more for life. In addition to the tax break of depreciation, interest payments for the house, and whatnot, you are allowed two tax-free visits per year to inspect your property; if it is some distance from your home, that could be a substantial savings if you already itemize your deductions. Since most college requires five years these days, even if only one child stays there, you should be able to sell it five years later at a profit, with the renters having given you the funds to make the payments for five years.
I hope that is clear enough to make you consider it. If not, Mr. Givens explains it better than I do, so see if you can find the book.
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posted by Nathan on
07:19 AM
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June 20, 2004
The main way that caffeine affects me is that it makes my mind race so fast that I cannot relax enough to fall asleep. Other things can do that, too.
When I was younger, it used to take me two hours to fall asleep, as I had to think through the whole day before I could slow my mind down enough to fall asleep. It may be why I overanalyze to this day, but that's another issue.
In college, I couldn't waste two hours trying to get to sleep, I was too busy. My body quickly learned to shut the mind down as I prepared for sleep. Now it usually doesn't take me longer than 5 minutes to fall asleep...if my wife suddenly decides there's something we need to talk about after I've brushed my teeth and changed into sleepwear, it's a battle to get back awake enough to listen, and then I have problems getting to sleep.
One thing that has worked every time I've thought of it is:
Counting backward from 20. If my mind is racing badly, I might start at 30. I start at a pace of about one digit per second. The second time through, I slow it down a little. The third time through, if necessary, I try to time it with my breathing, so it's more like "20, 19....18, 17....16, 15..." The fourth time through, I try to slow my breathing while I count.
I don't think I've ever needed more than four times through. But to be honest, I don't always remember to do it. I think I will be able to now. If it ever doesn't work, I'll let you know.
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That sounds like a pretty effective bit of self-hypnosis, Nathan.
posted by
Dean Esmay on June 21, 2004 04:11 AM
Well, I guess in the interest of honesty, I should admit I got the idea from Heinlein in my favorite book, Tunnel in the Sky.
posted by
Nathan on June 21, 2004 06:26 AM
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posted by Nathan on
02:19 PM
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June 16, 2004
The little debate I had with Dean over weight loss got me thinking about the whole issue. I already knew a good amount, but I learned some things from his linkings and my own further research. There simply wasn't enough information to even begin to sway my conviction that the biggest obstacle to permanent weight loss is the mind of the individual. But in all that thought, I began to consider what I would consider the ideal weight loss plan.
I'm not a doctor or a certified weight-loss professional, so if you think my plan sounds good, run it by someone qualified to get their input before implementing the following.
Here goes:
Read More "The Brain Fertilizer Weight-Loss Program" »
(Note: this is based on training I've received, articles I've read, and even some personal experiences and experimentation, all over the last twenty years, so I'm not going to bother providing links. You'll have to take me at my word or do the research yourself to debunk it. Your choice.)
1) You must be absolutely committed. You must not lie to yourself. You must not cheat on the diet. You must commit to probably 18 months of diet and activity changes. Even after the weight is lost, you will most likely never be able to return to the eating and activity habits you have now. If you are overweight, you got here for a reason, and you must change your lifestyle to make a permanent change in your weight and body composition. You must eventually convince yourself that food is, above all, merely fuel for the body, and enjoyment/satisfaction is a side benefit, not a goal.
2) Choose a diet plan. The main choices are: Low-fat, Low-carb, or Low-Calorie. Low-fat and Low-Calorie have been pretty much proven to be counterproductive to weight loss, since merely reducing calories puts your body into starvation mode, and low-fat usually results in high-carb eating, as well as denying you taste and eating satisfaction.
Atkins-style low-carbohydrates diets work for many people, because it minimizes the easiest fuel for body to use, thus making your body use more energy to extract what it needs. Morever, low-carb/high-protein/high-fat diets allow people to eat much of what they want, making it easier to stay on the diet. However, some critics who maintain that high-fat/high-protein can also damage your body's systems. Thus, my recommendation is:
2a) Plan on a low-carbohydrate diet, but pair that with moderate-protein and -fat amounts. Emphasize fresh vegetables and smaller portions overall in your diet. Eat lots of "good" salads, meaning, use dark-leaf lettuces with plenty of toppings, like onions, tomatoes, carrots, peas, sunflower kernels, bacon bits, egg, mushrooms, and don't skimp on the dressing. Eat more lean beef and chicken breast. To the greatest extent possible, eliminate sugar and flour. Eat lots of fiber-rich foods like walnuts and popcorn. Avoid processed food whenever possible. Keep track of carbohydrate grams and never go above 30 grams per day.
3) Before you even start dieting, spend one week gathering information on your habits and attitudes toward food. Carry a notepad and writing instrument with you everywhere, and write down everything you eat. Everything. Even if it's just taking a sip of your spouse's beer or snatching a french fry from your friend. It all counts. Write down when you feel hungry, and see if you can tell what triggers the thought. Start noting the difference between "hunger" and "wanting to eat". Write down your food urges, particularly in relation to specific emotional or situational cues. For example, do you want to end the meal with a dessert? Start the day with a donut? Celebrate the end of a big project at work? Do you want to celebrate all sorts of things by eating out? Write down how often you eat out, where, and what you eat. Buy a pedometer and start tracking how many miles/steps you walk in one day (steps is better, I'll explain why soon). Consider buying a small postal scale to weigh portion sizes (not absolutely necessary, but possibly helpful). Note your favorite foods, and spend extra time at the grocery store looking at more healthy options. Most grocery stores have low-carb alternatives. (I found a whole-wheat bread that has only 5 grams of carbs per slice, and doesn't taste like paper paste! I now have 2 slices for breakfast.) Check the carbs on everything, and be wary of the unexpected obstacles: you may find low-carb pasta, but most spaghetti sauces have lots of sugar! Start planning menus, and stock your larder enough that you have 2-3 choices of what to make each meal to match your mood.
4) Decide on a weight-loss goal. Determine your current weight by weighing yourself at the same time each day during your observation week. There will be some variation, because your body's weight can vary as much as five pounds during the day, depending on when/how much you eat or eliminate wastes... (I'm convinced that ignorance of that variation has discouraged more dieters...) Get a calender and write your current weight. Write down a target weight at one-week intervals, subtracting two pounds for each week. Note: you may lose faster than that; if so, you can always adjust your targets. Continue until have recorded your final weight goal, i.e., if you want to lose 50 pounds, you should have written a weight goal for 25 weeks.
5) Acquire a wide selection of spices. Specifically, use cinnamon and/or unsweetened cocoa powder when you crave chocolate/sweets; use parmesan cheese, garlic powder, basil, and/or oregano when you crave something zesty; use chile powder, tabasco sauce, or black pepper when you want something spicy; experiment with cumin (cumano) and nutmeg, because I have no idea how to classify those. Try out spice blends, as well.
6) Start the diet. Continue recording everything you eat and your urges/yearnings. When you have an urge to cheat, make yourself wait four hours. If you still have the urge after four hours, take one bite and give the rest to someone else.
7) Since you determined your average daily step count with the pedometer, try to increase your step count by 100 each day. Make it a game to see all the ways you can increase your step count, i.e., parking farther away from the entrance when you go out, taking the stairs instead of the elevator, even if for only one floor. The point isn't to wear yourself out with exercising for only an hour and then collapse on the coach, but to increase your overall activity throughout the whole day. Take up a more active hobby, even if just working in the garden. Stand up while talking on the phone or watching TV. Better yet, stop watching TV. Take your kids outside to play catch, or play catch with the neighbors kids.
8) Starting anywhere between week 1-3, begin lifting weights. Muscle burns a great deal of energy, so increasing your muscle mass will increase long-term weight loss. Moreover, building muscle will make you feel stronger and being stronger will mean you use less energy for the same task, making you feel more energetic. Finally, anaerobic elevates your metabolism for longer periods than aerobic (sweaty, out-of-breath exercise) exercise...although that will come later. "Lifting weights" doesn't mean going to the gym to do bench-presses, rather, it can be as simple as standing 2-3 feet from a counter and doing "push-ups" at a 60-degree angle. Gradually increase the angle as you get stronger. Do leg-lifts, even if you can only do a few at the start. A set of dumbbells that allows you to add weight is also good, particularly if you can find a Joyce Vedral 20-minute Workout book (check your library or local bookstore...). Her system of weight-loss includes low-fat dieting, so I don't recommend her total program, but the overall plan to use light-weight dumbbells to increase strength over the entire body is nothing short of excellent. There are many choices, the specifics are up to you.
9) At some point, join a Yoga or Tai Chi class. Either one will increase your overall strength, flexibility, sense of well-being, and positively impact your health. The better you feel about yourself, the easier it will be to stick to your new health (diet/exercise) plan. And, of course, it will raise your activity level that much more...
10) At some point, you must begin aerobic exercise. I say "at some point", because obesity can make aerobic exercise extremely difficult and unpleasant. Obviously, extreme exercise will probably never be easy and pleasant, but the point is to set you up for success, not failure. Do not go out and buy an exercise machine. 80% of exercise machines (or something extreme like that) end up gathering dust within a few months. Standing in one place to exercise eliminates many of the necessary positive experiences necessary to encourage exercise. When you feel you are ready to start exercising, begin with power-walking at the mall, or walking around your neighborhood in nice weather. Pull a wagon with your young children, or with neighbor children if you don't have any of your own. Go bicycling at a slow to moderate pace. Swim laps. The point is not to raise a sweat at first, but to enjoy yourself while trying to establish a regular exercise program. Once you establish the habit, then you should switch to trying to raise a sweat. The other aspect to "at some point" is that if you are losing weight at a 2 pounds/week rate merely by altering your diet choices and trying to be more active, then there is no need to "torture" yourself with an exercise regimen until/unless you find yourself hitting a plateau...
11) If you do find yourself hitting a plateau, i.e., not maintaining a 2 pounds/week rate, the first thing to do is check to see if you are lying to yourself about cheating on the diet. The human mind is amazingly flexible in getting what the subconscious wants despite the active will of the conscious mind. Your subconscious will try to get you to quit. You will become discouraged. You will want to cheat. If you want to cheat, you may take a day off no more often than once a month. On that day, you can eat anything you want. Go to an all-you-can-eat buffet, eat ice cream and french fries. And when you are done, pull out your calender and change all your weight goals, moving them back by a full week. Yes, one day of unbridled eating can destroy a whole week of effort. Lesser cheating will have a lesser effect, of course, but any cheating will sabotage and undermine your efforts. If you think that the milkshake or french fries or baked potato won't hurt "just this once", then you have already lost. You need to consider those food choices gone forever. (they may not be, but that must be your attitude during weight-loss programs. If you concentrate on what you are missing, you will probably not succeed. More on that next)
12) When you reach your weight goal, you can relax one aspect. That is, you can eat more carbohydrates (50 grams/day), or you can stop aerobic exercise, or you can stop lifting weights, or you can stop elevating your general activity and start sitting down more. Watch yourself closely for six months, weighing yourself every day and preventing cheating. If, after six months, you still maintain your weight, you can eliminate another aspect, if you wish. If you start gaining any weight at any point, you should immediately go back on the full program for a full month to get yourself slightly below your target...that will provide some cushion for the next weight creep, but the cushion is unnecessary if you maintain weight without a hitch. If you make it through 12 full months without any single weight gain of more than 3 pounds or total weight gain of more than 5 pounds, you can start playing with the entire exercise/diet/weight-lifting program. This is the point at which you might be able to allow yourself an indulgence. This is the point where you can relax your self-observation to how well your chlothes fit or weighing yourself only 1-2 times a month. At this point, your whole approach to eating and activity should have changed, and your new habits should be entrenched. But, as always, if you relax too much and start gaining weight, you should immediately start the whole process over from the beginning, starting with self-observation and even redoing the 12-month maintenance observation after regaining your target weight.
If anyone can follow this plan faithfully (i.e., not go about it half-cocked to try and prove me wrong) and not lose weight, I'd like to hear about it.
Heck, you'll probably lose weight far more quickly than a mere two pounds per week. But expectations are a big part of the game, too. Exceeding them is always more reinforcing that merely meeting, much less falling short.
UPDATE:
The three most important components to weight loss are:
-Diet modification
-General activity increase (not just a 1-hour workout)
-Persistence
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Nate,
What you've basically described is The South Beach Diet which was created by Arthur Agatston, M.D. and recently popularized by a number of "celebrity" endorsers, including your old buddy, Bill Clinton. It's a controlled carb diet that focuses on eating the "right" carbs, as well as the best proteins and fats.
In general, I agree with you though -- low carb dieting, in combination with a reasonable level of physical activity and an overall change of attitiude, works. I've been on my diet since early january of '04, and I'm now down a bit more than 50 pounds since the last time you saw me...all without feeling like I've given up too many of the things I most enjoy. Best of all, once your blood sugar levels have stablized on a low-carb diet (usually 2-3 weeks for most people), you rarely suffer the intense hunger pangs. I now wait longer between meals, and fill up much faster during them. I've dropped two pants sizes, and can wear clothes that haven't fit since college. And I still occasionally "cheat" on the diet; I'm just much more aware of it these days.
As a suggestion for a good bread substitute, Mission makes a low-carb whole wheat tortilla (4 net carbs per tortilla) that tastes exactly like the "real thing" to both Kim and I. Frequently these days, I'll make wraps or taco-style sandwiches instead of traditional ones, and I never really miss the bread. Mission also make a large "burrito sized" version of this tortilla with only 9 grams of carbs; you can really load that one up with goodies.
posted by
Dalin on June 16, 2004 05:32 AM
I remember that phone conversation...but I do think that the "South Beach" part is pretty much only steps 2 and 2a...please correct me if I'm wrong.
One thing I forgot to add. There are Three vital components to weight loss:
-Diet modification
-Activity increase
-Persistence
Too many people forget the last one.
The fact that I haven't lost any additional weight since that phone conversation is because I've dropped the 3rd component more or less deliberately (this deployment makes choosing my own menu difficult)...
...at least I'm not gaining, however.
posted by
Nathan on June 16, 2004 05:37 AM
Your diet is more specific on an exercise regimen and self-monitoring, but TSBD also touches on all of those things...particularly in depth for your steps 4-6, 10 and 11.
Losing more weight isn't always the most important thing, and with all my travel I can certainly understand the challenges of sticking to any diet while being unable to plan your own menu; just maintaining can be a war in itself, and if you're succeeding there, bully for you!
It's also vital to remember that regardless of the nature of your diet, in the end, calories in must equal calories out. Low-carb isn't a license to steal. That's where the whole "attitude change about food" really comes into it.
posted by
Dalin on June 16, 2004 05:51 AM
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