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April 10, 2008

Custody Battle Musings « Stuff Important to Me »

After thinking things over, I'm now 99% certain we won.

This is because going into the trial portion, the Custody Evaluator had said both parents seemed equally good at parenting, and based on this, the judge said to lay off the recriminations and talk about the positive reasons for custody being awarded to you.

Despite that, my ex-wife's main arguments were:
1) I am a bad dad
2) Spokane has better schools, and she has a big house
3) I interfered with her contact and visitation

My main retorts were:
1) The Custody Evaluator says I'm a great dad, and my wife is a great stepmother. Plus the Evaluator said we have a 3-year track record of success, but it's anyone's guess whether my ex- can continue to give the kids a good family or not.
--strike one for the ex-
2) Parental involvement matters more than a difficult-to-define school "quality", and we have concrete plans to give the kids the tools to have a successful life, not just a nice house to live in for a few years.
--strike two for the ex-
3) I did not intend to interfere with contact or visitation. I gave evidence I had made good faith efforts to ensure both, but she constantly acted in bad faith regarding both contact and visitation.
--strike three for the ex-

I may not have hit 100% on all three points, and there were a few other, less-central points that I might have only fought to a draw. But these three big points were all refuted, and she absolutely failed to demonstrate at all that she was anything more than "just as good", and that shouldn't be enough to win custody.

Add on top of that the fact that she admitted under oath that she'd been married for 2 full years, but let the Evaluator believe she'd been married only 4 months because no one asked*, and I think it revealed the falseness of even her plausible-sounding distortions.

*further, this is easily proved to be deliberate perjury, if necessary. We weren't on the attack, so we didn't attempt to introduce the email series where I did, in fact, ask her if/when/to whom she got married. And I sincerely doubt the Evaluator never once asked, "When did you get married?"

Posted by Nathan at 01:31 PM | Comments (32) | TrackBack (0)
Comments

Good.

How old are your kids? What do they think?

I really want the backstory sometime, if you feel like sharing it.

Posted by: Mr Lady at April 11, 2008 08:44 PM

Good for you--I don't know anything about your ex (except what you've said), but I know that you're a good father.

I do hope it went your way.

Posted by: zombyboy at April 14, 2008 05:56 PM

you need to

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