Brain Fertilizer

I've been tagged.

I'm slow, but I generally get around to stuff, eventually. So here goes.

Immediately following there is a list of different occupations. You must select at least 5 of them (feel free to select more). You may add more if you like to your list before you pass it on (after you select 5 of the items as it was passed to you). Each one begins with "If I could be..." Of the 5 you selected, you are to finish each phrase with what you would do as a member of that profession. For example, if the selected occupation was "pirate" you might take the phrase "If I could be a pirate..." and add to it "I would sail the 7 Seas, dating lasses from around the worlde." See how easy that is? Here's the list:

If I could be a scientist...

If I could be a farmer...

If I could be a musician...

If I could be a doctor...

If I could be a painter...

If I could be a gardener...

If I could be a missionary...

If I could be a chef...

If I could be an architect...

If I could be a linguist...

If I could be a psychologist...

If I could be a librarian...

If I could be an athlete...

If I could be a lawyer...

If I could be an innkeeper...

If I could be a professor...

If I could be a writer...

If I could be a llama-rider...

If I could be a bonnie pirate...

If I could be an astronaut...

If I could be a radio talk show host...

If I could be a congressional staffer...

If I could be an entrepreneur ...

If I could be a frontiersman...

If I could be a swashbuckler...

So, okay: skipping the obvious and semi-obscene ("If I could be a linguist, I'd be very cunning" and "If I could be a missionary, I'd assume the position whenever possible"), I guess I'm left with:

If I could be a librarian, I'd library in the morning, I'd library in the evening, all over this tow-own! (sing it with me!)

If I could be an innkeeper, I'd make sure I was known for having the best and widest selection of fine, dark beers in the entire area. Plus good water (to help avoid hangovers and clear the palate) and hearty breakfasts (to chase away the remnants of hangovers). So I guess I'd have to have a package deal that includes renting the room for the night and including a 12-pack of your favorite brew, plus a big breakfast in the morning. All for $100, or so.

If I could be a musician, I'd offer up mp3s of my music for free and let people donate to keep me in enough money to keep making music.

Um, I don't really have anyone I feel like tagging with this meme, but if you want to give your own response, feel free to do so in the comments, or link back to this post.